Being so different than the others around you is like a rainbow without rain; you seem outstanding and adorable but some might see you as a joke and surreal in a bad way. Those who know how beautiful you are with the spirit of positive radiance that you have will make them get affected by it, but, horribly, those who do not know how to embrace the differences of the beauty in this world will bring you down with their horrible curses and blunt mocks.
I’ve been through the horrible phase where I was surrounded by people with no rich vocabulary of diamond words. It made me feel not worthy at all, I felt like being some inches taller than them was a curse, I was treated like an alien. I am 5’10” and that is not something usual in Indonesia, mostly for a girl who comes from a very small city in Borneo. But we all know that a beautiful creature takes some phases until they metamorphose into the best of them. To reach that best of them (us) takes a lot of phases, not one or two, I’d like to say infinity phases thus we never stop metamorphosing to becoming the best of us!
One thing that kept me growing was the dream which built by reading. I read a lot and dreamt a lot! I knew I had something powerful, my knowledge. Until I reached the time where those people mocked me and said harsh words, I knew those were only trashes. You do not need to swallow their trash sentences! Always believe you have something more and you are beautiful in your own way! Finally I went to uni and left them all, one of the victorious moments in my life. People in the new place still looked at me differently, but they never mocked me (even some of them still said stupid words, showing how blunt they are). They had that adoration gaze, a look of adoration. My good friends always told me “they are amazed by you” – such a good feeling to be surrounded by people with positive vibes!
It was (is) still so hard to love myself. Every time somebody gave me compliments, I would doubt it while thinking that would not be true. As time goes by, as many articles of women empowerment been published and written by all strong women, I knew it was the act of positive vibe someone transfered into you. Then, I would and will always say “thank you”! Always!
I am so grateful I have met so many radiant people in my life. I barely got compliments back in my hometown, no, too bad it did not happen. But as I moved out and went traveling, I learnt a lot and got so many experiences I’d never thought would happen to me. I got a very meaningful beautiful gift from my Vietnamese friend, a charm bracelet. He told me I have a bright and beautiful smile, do not ever let everything bring you down and always keep smiling. I am sure I was doubting it when he told me that, but when I’m typing this I am praising the universe for being so kind to me.
I am surrounded by people and good friends with extra good positive vibes! I have one who always sends me a morning text and gives spirit through her positive texts. I do the same to the others, I spread her positive vibes to the others. Since years ago, I stopped posting negative comments and complaints on my social media. If I could not hold myself into posting my emotional texts, I just typed it and took a screenshoot of it and never tap on “update/post” button. It is very safe and helps you from future problems because of the emotional status.
Be happy and do not listen to bad whispers is the key to stay positive. Well if you feel all those negative energies consume you, stay away from them! Block them if you need to or just simply unfollow them, have a rest for your consious brain and soft heart, do not push them too hard. Whenever you think you cannot take it, breathe! Inhale and exhale. The best mantra you could have asked for. Feel the air in your nose and let it go through your mouth.
Stay and embrace the positiveness in yourself, and let the magic work. The positive energy will surround you once you embrace it. Remember, we have the infinity phases. We may don’t be able to love ourself in some phases, but in next phases, we will make it. We are humans, something might bring us down but it won’t stay forever, we will rise again and be more beautiful than ever. Everybody is beautiful, you and you. Embrace it, beautiful.